When you cage children, they abuse freedom – Chineze, Youth Counsellor

A mother of five, three of whom are undergraduates, Mrs.Chineze Ajoku, believes that children are more likely to turn out right if given some measure of freedom while growing up. The Head of Youth Department of the Roses Ministry, a faith-based non-profit organization, spoke exclusively to Vista Woman during a recent annual youth seminar put together by the Roses Ministry in Lagos. A graduate of English Language with a Diploma in Secretarial Administration, Mrs.Chimezie Ajoku is the MD/CEO of Cinet Bridal in Lagos.

Some parents claim it’s always difficult to understand young people; what has been your own experience?

It’s not easy working with youths, but for me, it has been interesting because I’m a very friendly person. I have four teenagers, and I’m very close to them. We mix freely, dance, sing, joke, and do all sorts of things. Before you can penetrate the lives of young people, the truth is, you have to be their friend. So, they get close to me naturally. That’s why I always encourage mothers to get close to their children because that’s the only time they can know about their problems. You can’t know someone’s problems when you’re so distant. I have a set of twin boys in the university; one is a member of a musical group and the other is a footballer playing defence. I give them all the moral support instead of preventing them from honing their skills.

In the same way, I make sure they are serious with their academics! I’m able to guide them this way because they are free with me and I know their activities at almost every point. If I were the sort of parent that would warn them against their talents, they would always sneak out without my knowledge! I remember when they had to attend a party organized by their mates after their graduation from secondary school. I allowed them and directed one of their aunts whose house was nearer the venue to go pick them after the party.


Mrs.Chimezie Ajoku.
To be sure they were all together, I would talk to the aunt on phone and then tell her to give the phone to them. Most times, when you fail to give such freedom to young people, when they enter university or go far away from you, they will engage in all sorts of things because they never had the exposure! When you’re too strict with children, they some tend to behave like late Michael Jackson; when they are old, they will go back to those things they could not do when they were young. So, you allow them go into every crucial stage so that they don’t miss out.

Source:Vanguard