Akpors @ the Police Station

Akpors was once a well-known big time rich dealer and wholesaler of all brands of Nokia and Samsung phones. One day, a customer came to his shop, purchased some merchandise and paid him with counterfeit currency. On realising this, Akpors rushed to a nearby police station to an official report there thus:

AKPORS: What type of rubbish and nonsense is this?

POLICE OFFICER: Hey young man, what exactly is your problem?

AKPORS: Just imagine this ! People don't have fear for their elders in this country again oo !

POLICE OFFICER: But what is the issue on ground ? Go direct to the point !

AKPORS: (Still boiling) But why are the people of this nation so cruel ? How I wish I'm an American or better still a German or an English ...

POLICE OFFICER: (Says impatiently) Now listen to me this man, are you prepared to state your issue or are you here to waste my time?

AKPORS: Okay ! Just imagine this sir !! A customer who thinks that he's a sharp guy gave me counterfeit currencies today. Fake money ! Purely invalid cash !!!

POLICE OFFICER: Now you are talking ! I hope you can recognise the guy who gave you that money very well?

AKPORS: (Smiles and says) But how on earth can I ever do that when millions of customers visit and purchase from my shop daily ?

POLICE OFFICER: Okay ! So where is the counterfeit money ? Give it to me now for proper examination and further investigations !

AKPORS: (Smiles and gets high) Officer, you should know that I'm not a 'DULL' guy. I have already spent the cash hours ago. I just came here to tell you people ...

POLICE OFFICER: (Feels like getting off his nerves and senses) - BuzzyNaija